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Dear Future Wife®: I Needed To Get Ready For You

My desire is to be everything you need me to be.

My goal is to be whatever you desired me to be.

I am not saying I will reach those goals but I will try.

Before I even attempt to, I realized I needed to get ready.

I needed to be alone.

There was a time I was hurt; I needed to heal.

There was a time where I wanted to play; I needed to get serious.

The way I hid my pain was in the games I played.

I can only imagine the pain I would have caused you if you were one of those I played with.

Not to let every woman off the hook.

There were those who played games with me and put me further in debt to my healing.

I needed to detox and focus on me and what I did.

The sad part is that when I played, I was ignorant to the fact that although I really wanted to get serious, my pain wouldn’t let me.

There was a time where I had distractions in my life that weren’t conducive to a successful partnership.

I had to work on me.

There were loose ends that were holding on to their false hopes, did things to hinder my progress and I allowed them.

There were times where I felt insufficient which resulted in dangerous self-preservation.

Self-preservation that prevented me from being “available” and hard to read.

I was good at not showing face.

I looked at my flaws as weapons or shields to attack others with.

I didn’t want to be vulnerable.

Who you are, my time to recover, and self-discovery prepared my readiness.

I designed and developed a Kingdom.

My Kingdom ready for a Queen.

I had to create my Kingdom prior to crowning you as my Queen.

I wanted you to be in awe when I placed that crown on your head.

I wanted you to experience the results of my hard work.

I wanted to demonstrate and reference evidence of what I built that was great and sustainable.

These examples will be a point of reference for you to know that I can and will apply the same work ethic to keeping you happy and loved.

Let’s build on this foundation.

Bring your Crown to my Kingdom, switch it out, and add some jewels that we will choose together.

I realize you were a Queen before we met!

I just want to make you my personal Queen without diminishing your accomplishments.

I apologize if I made you wait long and I appreciate your patience.

Your patience was evident without push or force that would normally push and force me to walk away from you.

Your patience was my water as I traveled across a desert of flaws.

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Bashea Williams, LCSW-C

Paul Bashea (Bah-Shay) Williams, LCSW-C, LICSW is described as an Intellectual Emotionalist. Someone who understands what a man thinks and what a woman feels. Helping the two meet and have common ground by encouraging emotion and logic to agree. He is a dedicated father, Licensed Certified Social Worker- Clinical, Relationship Specialist and Writer. He works with at-risk youth and specializes in marriage and family, couples, and individual counseling. He provides relationship advice to individuals and couples. He writes about life, love, and fatherhood. His writing, acting, and public speaking has been featured on panels throughout the country, Huffington Post and several other popular websites, national syndicated radio shows, television and movies. Bashea first started writing to first hold himself accountable and get a better understanding of people's hearts and minds. He loves how relationships work and operate. He strives to help others through his words. Bashea Williams has provided valuable insight on relationships, motivation, and parenting on a variety of panels and conferences. He is highly recruited and his work is valued as measurable and complete. He has years of providing counseling services for singles, couples, youth, and families. Bashea Williams has become well-known for his Trademarked Dear Future Wife series that serves as a man's guide and a woman's reference. His goal is to influence healthy relationships by having compromise, consideration, and an understanding of how people interact. You can follow his work at BasheaWilliams.com, BasheaWilliams on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Sojourner Truth

    It takes a noble man to see what the mirror is saying. Elated that she declined to be a happy hour many moons ago because she desired to be a lifetime celebration.

  2. Rachel Michaels

    wow. just wow.

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