Dear Future Wife™: The Little Things

Post author:Bashea Williams, LCSW-C
Post published:November 30, 2015
Post category:Dear Future Wife®
Post comments:1 Comment

The little things we do will sustain our relationship and nurture our love.

Random hugs from the back where our hands explore our desire to stay connected.

A quick text calling you beautiful even when you don’t feel like you have your best face on.

Beating me to “Good morning” on the days you wake before me.

An “I am proud of you and happy that you are mine” helps me push forward and reminds me of the reason.

Reason for love. Reason for us. Reason for me. Reason for you. Reason for commitment. Reason for forever. Reason to trust each other with our hearts. Reason to be vulnerable. Reason to break out of our protective “shell”.

It’s all about Comfort, Connection, and Catering!

Letting go of restrictions that prohibit us from doing what we like to do to make each other happy.

A lot of times the effort in doing the little things is more about us giving than those receiving. Doing the little things is about keeping others happy.

I appreciate the fact even though arguments are hard, getting over them is easy because we want to love each other more than hate our differences.

I like the fact that when I see something that another man does for his woman, I can say in my head “I do that too”.

I like the fact that when I see something another woman does for her man, I can say in my head “You do that too”.

Little things, like “How is/was your day?” “How can I make it better?” “Laying in silence”.

We listen before trying to fix because we don’t always need a cure. We may just need an open ear that listens as opposed to hears ways to interject.

Little things like allowing each other to be the expert in our experiences.

Little things like a note in the mailbox. A card in our briefcase. A letter in the glove compartment.

They’re things little and specific to us that lets us know we are paying attention to what we like individually and collectively.

Cutting the game off because your show is about to come on. Cutting your show off because the game is about to come on.

More Love Mondays: Where we go overboard on making sure each other is appreciated. (Prepares us for the week)

Take Turns Tuesdays: Whose turn is it to put their feet up and relax. To be treated like the royal person they are? (Mondays are hard)

Why Wednesdays: A reminder of why we love each other, why we chose each other and why we continue to work for each other. (Mid-week evaluation and reminder)

Throw Out Thursdays: A day to vent, release the frustrations of the week so far and look forward to our impending weekend.

Free Fridays: We made it! It’s the weekend! Where are we going emotionally, physically, psychologically and mentally when we clock out?

Saturday and Sunday will be inventive and collaborative on how all those little things we did during the week will be rewarded and recognized.

When you walk up behind me and hug me randomly while I am doing something is an experience that tells me “we are okay”. Your hands touched more than my body. They grabbed my armor, peeled it away, only to replace it around us. We are okay.

As I write and think about my DEARFUTUREWIFE™, I can imagine her saying “You know I’d do it” when I ask her if she is ready for the little things.

(Image credit: quote-wishes.com)

Bashea Williams, LCSW-C

Paul Bashea (Bah-Shay) Williams, LCSW-C, LICSW is described as an Intellectual Emotionalist. Someone who understands what a man thinks and what a woman feels. Helping the two meet and have common ground by encouraging emotion and logic to agree. He is a dedicated father, Licensed Certified Social Worker- Clinical, Relationship Specialist and Writer. He works with at-risk youth and specializes in marriage and family, couples, and individual counseling. He provides relationship advice to individuals and couples. He writes about life, love, and fatherhood. His writing, acting, and public speaking has been featured on panels throughout the country, Huffington Post and several other popular websites, national syndicated radio shows, television and movies. Bashea first started writing to first hold himself accountable and get a better understanding of people's hearts and minds. He loves how relationships work and operate. He strives to help others through his words. Bashea Williams has provided valuable insight on relationships, motivation, and parenting on a variety of panels and conferences. He is highly recruited and his work is valued as measurable and complete. He has years of providing counseling services for singles, couples, youth, and families. Bashea Williams has become well-known for his Trademarked Dear Future Wife series that serves as a man's guide and a woman's reference. His goal is to influence healthy relationships by having compromise, consideration, and an understanding of how people interact. You can follow his work at BasheaWilliams.com, BasheaWilliams on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube.